edge of the continent

I rang out the old year with margaritas and tequila shots last night with friends from the office, and in my honor we toasted to adventure, love, and a new dawn (in reference to my yearly ritual of a solo trek to the shore, where i reflect on the previous twelve months and look ahead to the year before me). Lovely, lovely, lovely. Having crashed on a friend’s couch, I didn’t make it to the beach this morning, but he has a deck with a terrific view of downtown and the bay that I took advantage of. I stood outside under overcast skies and let the universe run through me: I am strong and confident, centered, peaceful… and ferocious, with a world of possibility at my feet.

clarity of thought
vistas open before me
i can see for miles

it’s going to be a lovely and amazing year.

In the middle of a conversation over yellow curry chicken and Thai iced coffee, a friend relayed some information to me on the condition that I not repeat it to anyone. I nearly choked on a pepper from laughing — I couldn’t even tell you just how many times I’ve heard that request. No doubt most everyone has been asked at one time or another to keep certain news quiet, but I actually do keep my mouth shut when asked and the information literally stops with me. I’m quite the repository of information and gossip around the office and amongst my circles of friends, but despite suggestions to the contrary it is doubtful that a tell-all book is in my future. Somehow an expose on a group of friends at an office isn’t particularly sexy, and on the more practical level our indiscretions and dramas and such are just the same old tales told the world over: the players and the played, the haves and the have-nots, the loved and the loveless…

Maybe i could make it into a film instead.

In an effort to outreach to parents with information on student success programs and extracurricular activities in the neighborhood, a civic group I belong to hosted an educational festival at a local park today. The festival came off rather well: there was an excellent turn-out, we had to make only two extra runs for more food and sodas, and the kids had a good time and went home with free books and silly hats. One disappointment during the day was that I was so caught up in keeping things flowing (because our number of core volunteers was so low) that I didn’t have an opportunity to just go out into the crowds and assess their enjoyment of the event.

This is the first time I’ve worked with a community group to plan an event such as today’s and while pleased with the day’s success, I was disappointed and often frustrated with the process that made it possible. A group of eight signed up to plan it, but the actual work to be done before- and on the day of the festival fell on the shoulders of three. It was difficult to hide my impatience with the leader of the planning team, who managed to delegate all of the work but wouldn’t commit to doing any of it himself. The main group consists of some twenty-five people, but not even five of them volunteered to work the day of the event. And while I am fairly easy-going, my tolerance for the latecomers to the planning team grew thin with each passing week as these folk would come in and criticize the decisions we had made and insist that our plans be changed around; they had plenty of opportunity to help shape the event in the beginning… where were they then? I spoke with a colleague who works as an event planner with all sorts of groups, and she explained to me that these are all common problems in the planning process — flakiness and lack of commitment will be high and the event will end up resting on the shoulders of two or three while the credit will go to the entire group and its leaders.

The festival was definitely a learning experience in group dynamics and event planning, and I’m all for doing it or something similar again. Yet there is such a disproportionate number of people who will spout their opinions but are nowhere to be found when it comes down to getting things done… I would like to believe that their intentions are good, but why be there if they are only going to balk at performing any work to back up those intentions? I haven’t decided if I should simply accept that people behave that way and work around it, or fight that and insist on dedication and shared work. I’m still too much of an idealist for my own good, I think.

I am very anti-summer weather. It’s certainly not the fault of the season; it cannot help being the time of year where temperatures rise faster than my limited wardrobe adjustments can keep up with.

What i would do for a bed of snow to lay down in right now! Cold weather is wonderful: you can always add warmth by throwing on an extra layer or one more blanket, but this? I could strip naked and there is no relief. I wilt, my pores ooze with sweat, my skin breaks out, shirts stick to my back… I am fatigued, listless. I’ve neither any heat- nor humidity tolerance, and I’m living here of all places. We certainly do create our own miseries, do we not?